Don’t wanna be… all by myself!

Sometimes I wish I had a friend I could trust, who could understand me completely.

Take your time reading this…

I’ve been SO busy!!  So busy that I haven’t blogged in a little while.  I have been cleaning, cooking, remodeling, working out, reading, running, and a whole lot more.  Good thing I haven’t committed to blogging EVERY DAY!  I understand that there are many people who can blog everyday religiously (those are the ones I love reading, by the way) with enough content to keep you happy until the next one.  However, I am NOT one of them.  Maybe one day I’ll get there, but for now, I’m happy blogging when I really feel inspired to.  Which leads me to my inspiration…

MY HUSBAND!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I was sitting, thinking about how long it’s been since the last time I’ve blogged.  I started thinking about all of the things I’ve been doing and it made me realize that I haven’t blogged because of my husband!  Now, before you assume that I’m going to “bash” my husband for occupying all of my time, or being so selfish and demanding that I haven’t had the time to blog, hear me out…

My husband is my BEST FRIEND…  He has been so supportive of me and my happiness.  He accepts me for who I am, no matter how different or similar we are, he allows me to be ME.  He listens and understands that I have my own desires in life he knows that they will not always be identical to his.  He has pushed me to find out what drives me in life and what makes me happy and has given me the time and space to pursue them!  So, is it my husband’s fault that I haven’t been blogging? YES.  Is that a bad thing? HELL no!  It is because of him, that I can wake up each morning with a renewed passion to go after my dreams.  It is because of him that I have the opportunity to not only blog about my life but to also LIVE my life.  It is because of him that I have been so busy pursuing my dreams, enjoying my hobbies, and loving life that I haven’t been able to take the time to sit and type it out on my blog!

I have NO intentions of ending or deleting my blog, but I can see that the frequency in which I give my time to it will be greatly adjusted.  And that’s okay.  I can have my cake and eat it too!

To my hubby:  I love you with all of my heart.  To have a partner in life that is supportive and understanding, trustworthy and dependable and who desires the best in life for me is something that I wouldn’t trade in for the WORLD!  Knowing that I will have someone by my side to laugh with, talk with, debate with, smile with, travel with, express myself with, listen with, raise a family with, relax with, make love with, cook with, clean with, eat with, discover with, cry with and hurt with is all anyone really needs.  You have shown me what LOVE really is.  Love is not just a feeling but an act.  It is not always pretty, and is tested from time to time.  But to know that we’re still together and are both committed to being the partner to each other that we both need is what means so much.

So, I say, thanks babe for keeping me off of Word Press.  Thank you for pushing me to go after my dreams.  Thank you for supporting all that I do.  Thank you for accepting me and allowing me to discover who I am.  Thank you for being YOU.

With all my heart, I love you.

It’s been a minute!

Man, I’ve been blog-lazy this past week.  And there’s been so much to blog about too!  Oh well, life goes on…

Soooo.. let me re-cap:

Number ONE: I’m now BACK on Facebook.. Yes, I know that I was a believer of all things non-social, and taking a break really did help!  However, in that break I realized that it wasn’t FACEBOOK, TWITTER, TUMBLR, or any of the other networks.. It was ME..  I learned that everything can be enjoyed within REASON!! The internet, TV, apps, reading, exercising, eating, talking, working, WHATEVER it is, there should be a LIMIT.  The limit is not there to stop me from enjoying life, it is there to PROTECT me.  I learned to put protective boundaries around the people I love and the things I love to do.

I was reminded of how much I love to find and cook new recipes, how much I love to take care of my family and my house, and a handful of other things.  I have a new outlook.  I was so ready to just give up on it all, but I realized that I love communicating and sharing with others and that things just needed to be put in their “place.”

Number Two:  I decided to try and cook a homemade chicken pot pie!!!! YAY me!!!  I really wanted to take pics of the whole process and share them on here, but hopefully I can get some the next time around.  I used boneless, skinless chicken breasts, frozen peas and carrots, and russet potatoes.  My first go at it was a #HUGEFAIL but I pointed out my mistakes and quickly recovered.  The second time around, I ACED it!  It was SO good too..

I’ve really more BUSY and less LAZY than what I gave off.  The kiddos started school, I edited TWO books for my hubby, and I’ve been working hard on my music.  I WILL, however, try to be more consistent with this blogging “thing,” it really does help my focus, my temper, and reminds me that after all of my feelings have been poured out, I can get to what’s IMPORTANT.  So, thank God for Facebook, WordPress, and everything that has a place in my life.  I’m learning how to prioritize and it feels GREAT!!!

Live life and shyne!! ❤

Just another weak day..

I know what you’re thinking, “Hey lady, you have a ‘typo’ in your title!”  Whoa there partner, it was intentional.  Yes, it’s another weekday, but for me, it’s also another WEAK day.

Have you ever woke up in the morning, feeling like you could just get back in the bed and wake up when you’re in a better mood?  Well, that was me today.  I woke up and I immediately saw all of the house chores I’ve been ignoring.  I’ve been doing some reading and editing for an upcoming book and I’ve put most of my energy, time and attention in it.  Needless to say, I’ve slacked on housework a bit.  Not only that, I really haven’t gotten out of the house much at all.  I went to the grocery store a few times in the last couple of weeks, but nothing major.  So on top of cabin fever, I woke up feeling annoyed and defeated.

However, I was not willing to let this feeling control my day.  I thought, “I HAVE to blog this morning.  For me, blogging has presented the opportunity to release my feelings and emotions without really caring about who reads my posts or what they think about them.  Nobody knows who I am, so even though some may criticize, I know that they are only sharing an opinion of me, not the truth.  Anyway, I just wanted to share my feelings and move past them.  I don’t want to feel this way, and it’s really up to me if I remain this way.  I have been too blessed to have a “pity party.”  Is it okay to feel this way? YES!  Will I always wake up in the “perfect” mood? NO!  What’s important to me is that I don’t STAY in this mood.  Thinking of all the things that I love and appreciate in my life gets me out of it quicky and that’s what I intend to do.

Life is too short and too valuable to stay stuck in a “pit” all day.  I am going to push myself to reach my goals and be HAPPY about it.  Life is good.  I’m breathing, so what’s there to complain about?  I’m going to take the time to enjoy my day, not mope in it.  The sun is shining bright and I love it!  Great day, here I come!

Live life and shyne! ❤

Dang-blasted Facebook!!!

So, remember when I told you I deleted all of my social network accounts?  Oh, don’t worry, I didn’t re-activate them, lol.  HOWEVER, I am having the WORST damn withdrawal a person could have!!  Okay, okay, there are much worse withdrawal scenarios possible, but I had NO idea it would be this bad.

When I think about it, for the past few years, I have heard notification after notification, felt vibrating buzz after buzz, and responded to the little red and green flashing light on my phone more often than ANYTHING else.  So naturally, there’s going to be some withdrawal.  This is actually a good thing though.  If I am suffering this much, it shows me how much of my time, attention and energy I have invested in those sites.  No wonder they can advertise now!  With the amount of traffic they receive on a daily, hell, HOURLY basis, more companies need to reconsider why they AREN’T to advertising on them!

I will be okay though.  One step, one day at a time.  I am detoxing from YEARS of habit.  My desire to live in the moment and appreciate people and myself is much stronger than wanting to renege on my commitment.  I really believe that this is going to open up many doors for me to experience an exciting life!  I mean, the majority of people hardly even look up when they’re walking past me.  So, for me to stop and SPEAK to them, just might frighten them a little, lol.  At the park, I’ll actually look around, play with my children and maybe have a conversation with someone else who is there, rather than sitting on the bench and “watching” my children play while I conveniently scroll through Twitter, Facebook, Tumblr and YouTube.  I will have opportunity after opportunity to enjoy what is around me. I’m excited, aren’t you?!

I’m definitely NOT saying that I will never rejoin a few of the sites.  BUT, when I do, I will have a better appreciation for them as well as my time away from them.  So… withdrawal, day ONE… *sigh*  Not as bad as I thought after all.

Live life and shyne!! 😉

Mission deletion…complete!!!

Social Networking.. hmmm.. what can I say about it?  It is a piece of this culture that has escalated far past what I ever imagined.  What seems like a LONG time ago, I used to meet my friends and family at an actual social location, not a social website.  I used to see people face to face because I wanted to, not because I had to.  I remember some families even having weekly family dinners just to make sure they had a chance to see each other and catch up on what everyone had been doing.  Huh, look at how far we’ve come: Facebook, Twitter, Youtube, Google+, Email, Text, and an extensive list of others.

Now, it seems like I see others only when necessary.  Although the social networking websites have created a way for me to reach out and even reconnect with those I would normally have no chance to interact with (which, for that I am thankful), they have also made me lazy.  Years ago, if a friend had a baby or someone ended up in the hospital, or even sick at home, I would be the first one to visit and make sure they had everything they needed.  But, now?  Now, I send a text to make sure they know that I’m thinking about them, I post on their “page” with lots of love, and send flowers via email.  HUGE difference.

Well, not anymore.  I have deleted all of my relevant accounts with the major social networking sites, and have decided to indulge in my blog.  Instead of communicating with people who I don’t have personal relationships with and forcing every detail of my life down their throats, I’d rather have a safe, anonymous place that I can be myself without worrying about the repercussions of others’ opinions and comments.  I can log in and let my thoughts and emotions be free.  I’m anonymous, so it doesn’t matter what others say. I can make time for my family and my children without checking my phone for notifications every 5 seconds.

I want to get back to enjoying my day.  Reading a book, finding a new recipe and cooking a new dish, playing board games with my kids, and snuggling up with my hubby to a flick.  I want to go to more comedy shows, travel the world, meet new people, try new foods, and live!  Don’t you wanna come with me?  Come on, let’s leave the old, beaten path of depending on social networking to enjoy life and create a new path of living!

Let’s go! 😉

Say it again!!!

I ran across this quote on twitter: “Sometimes you just gotta accept that some people can only be in your heart, not in your life.” – Evelyn Lozada

This quote pretty much sums up the last 2 years of my life!  I have fought, chased, begged, cried, and said ‘goodbye’ to some people who at some point meant something to me in my life.  Although with good intentions, I wanted to keep them in my life for fear of losing them forever.  Fortunately, I have realized that keeping people who have no purpose or place in my life only hurt my feelings as well as my relationship with them.  I expected too much from them, when all the time, they weren’t capable of filling the holes of my heart.

Have you ever wanted something so bad but knew it would never be any good for you?  Well, I am here to tell you: LET GO!!! Keeping someone or even something in your life that isn’t purposeful only hurts you even more.  Let go and embrace new things, new people!  You don’t have to stop loving them, or even erase them from your memory.  What you do have to do is MOVE ON…

Don’t sell yourself short.  Don’t diminish your worth.  Know that who you are, deserves whatever it is that you want.  Live life happy and free, and the right people and things will come along.  Don’t be afraid to live!

The OLD ME..

The old me would emotionally respond to you.

The old me would bring up all of the things you did to hurt me.

The old me would laugh in your face because you can see that you need me.

The old me would show the world your flaws and point out your mistakes.

The old me would put your needs above my own and ignore my worth.

The old me would sacrifice my time and energy just to make sure you were alright.

The old me would live and breathe every moment considering you.

The old me would die for you.

I did die for you.

It was LOVE that resurrected me.

The NEW me knows I am valuable and priceless.

The NEW me knows I cannot love another without loving myself first.

The NEW me knows a real friend is one who reciprocates love.

The NEW me knows each day should be cherished regardless of who’s in it.

The NEW me knows to give without expecting anything in return.

The NEW me is at peace with who I am and doesn’t need anything from you.

The NEW me knows that despite the past, I’m still here for you.

The NEW me LOVES you unconditionally.

Thank GOD for the NEW ME..

An epiphany..

Ever had a moment when everything seems to make sense?

Well, today, I learned that everything doesn’t have to be so serious. I have been so emotionally attached to people and things, that ”moving on” was never a true option. Although EASY to say, I could never move on because just the thought of a specific situation or person would get me upset and emotion all over again.

Until today.. I realized that no matter what happens, who comes in and out of my life, I have to learn to ENJOY IT! I will only live on this earth ONCE, so why not take advantage of every moment and learn how to enjoy it, no matter what??

It’s not an easy journey. Life has it’s way of getting you excited and then throwing you in a ‘pit.’ It will have you flying high in the sky one day, then at the bottom of a muddy puddle, the next day. Nevertheless, it is KEY that I learn to see the good and the peace in every moment. God is so good, that technically, there shouldn’t be a moment in my life that I can’t thank Him. On good days, there’s something to be thankful for. On bad days, there’s still something to be thankful for.

So, here I am. Relieved and at peace. I’m ready to embrace each day, focus on the things that my heart reveals to me, and enjoy the people who are in my life regardless of the day, circumstance, or my attitude —- my FAMILY. Everyone else is just a bonus!

I encourage you to step back for a moment. Realize what’s important to you and, who’s important to you. Begin to put protective “borders” around them and learn to put them FIRST with each blessed day. Cherish them, love them, and honor them. You too, will have a life full of peace, joy and love.

Holding on..

Today, I woke up & read a passage from “Jesus, Life Coach.” It was inspiring, to say the least. It made me see all the things that are challenging my promise, my confidence, my courage and my peace. However, this time, I saw them for what they really are – just a figment of my imagination.

When we see that our reality is not what we SEE, but rather what we KNOW, we can be encouraged to fight on. We can live a life full of risks, leaps of faith & dramatically painted scenes of love, passion & desire. We can live a life full of courage to do what our hearts drive us to do; to live out our dreams. Take the time to see your reality!